The healing power of flowers

On Sunday, John and I arrived in Pasadena. I had no idea what to expect ... what or how I would feel about being here. I had slowed down for an entire week in Arizona. I wasn't sure if I was ready to take things off the brakes just yet for the Rose Parade activities and the frenzy of activity. 

Then Sunday evening came and we placed dedicated flowers in memory of Kayla and my dad on the Donate Life Rose Parade float. There was something about putting those flowers on a parade float that symbolizes LIFE with portraits made of all natural materials of deceased organ, eye and tissue donors, transplant recipients riding the float and living donors walking alongside it. 

My dad loved flowers. He loved to plant them, care for them and watch them grow. He knew every flower by name. He worked tirelessly at the church where I got married to plant red and purple flowers - our wedding colors. He wanted it perfect. Digging in the dirt, planting God's colorful creations was his therapy and among many of his passions. 

It was so fitting that we dedicated a rose to him in the parade where flowers abound in their vibrant  shades of purples, reds, pinks, yellows and blues. 

And for Kayla, it goes without saying that dedicating a flower for her on this float was more than appropriate. Because someone gave her the precious gift of life, she was able to marry my brother, teach and adopt my nephew. Her life was cut short because a second heart transplant did not come to fruition, but when she died she gave life to others through tissue donation and the precious gift of sight to someone who could not see. 

Do I wish I could share the experience with each of them? You bet. Dad would be interested in hearing about all the flowers and would laugh when John told him about the infamous yellow carnations. Kayla would love to hear all the stories of the recipients and donor families. While I can't tell them face-to-face, I know that they were there with me in spirit as that float made it's way down Colorado Blvd. on that beautiful day. 

I'm convinced that there is some type of healing power in flowers. The colors, the varieties, the shapes,  the uniqueness. The flowers on that float represented hope and healing for thousands of people across the country, including me. 

Dedication garden

"Light up the World" in her glory the day before the parade. 

Everything and I mean everything was made of flowers or natural materials. 

The flowers dedicated for Kayla and my dad were the bright orange variety. 

Christmas 2013

Christmas 2013 was a mixed bag for sure.
It was the first Christmas without my dad. That made it unbelievably hard. I thought spending the holidays with my inlaws would ease the pain. I was so wrong!  You can't run from sadness and grief. You just can't.
The highlight of this Christmas was celebrating early with my niece and all three nephews. I may have gone overboard with the presents, but I didn't care. Buying gifts for those precious faces brought me unbelievable joy and eased some of the hurt.
I'm looking forward to our family being together again after the holidays. We are still on the road of healing and Christmas will NEVER be the same, but we can create new and happy memories along our journey.
Below are some photos from the early celebration. Poor Will had the flu. Somehow I managed not to get any photos of him ... :(

Matthew in his cap from Uncle John.

Ethan with his new plane. 

Elizabeth with her Snoopy. 

Matthew with his slippers ...his favorite gift. :)

Dad's voice

Just got back from Christmas Eve services. I know every word to every Christmas carol, but I couldn't bring myself to sing ... no matter how much I tried. I heard my Dad's voice in every song. He used to sing "Joy to the World" and others in harmony.
I remember a red song book ... I remember the cover. It had a drawing of kids singing around a decorated light pole. It was used so much throughout the years ... Dad and I would sing from it all the time. It is what he used to teach me all those songs. He would play many of them on the organ ... the organ that sat in the parlor in our house in New York in the same room as the Christmas tree.
Maybe next year I will be able to sing. This year, it just couldn't bring myself to do it. I know Dad is singing the Christmas carols in heaven as he celebrates in heaven with Jesus this year.

Kids at heart

John, John's dad and I went to a light show at McCormick Railroad Park in Scottsdale. We boarded a train and took a trip through a Christmas village with lights and music. Kids and kids at heart (like us) were there. Our favorite display was stuffed animals riding a ski lift. There was also a Charlie Brown display and of course, Santa and his elves. Below are a few highlights:

Christmas treasures

Today we decorated for Christmas at John's parents house. I really had fun looking through all of the treasures. My favorite of all is the set of wiseman. John's grandma made it.  What a neat afternoon! 

All it needs is a little love

Charlie Brown's Christmas 

Praying

Yesterday my 3-year-old niece, 2-year-old nephew and 8-year-old nephew had to say goodbye to the comfort and security of their dad for a week.
That might not seem like a big deal, but believe me, it's a big deal.
These children have through extraordinary circumstances and finally had some stability weaved into their lives and now they have to be gone for a week.
I've prayed for them for a long time ... throughout the uncertainty of what would happen and I'm praying for them today.
My heart is full of love for these children. They are a blessing to me and my family.

Lord,
I pray for the safety of Will, Elizabeth and Ethan. Please watch over them and protect this week and always. Please watch over my brother and our family friend as they travel back to Texas and then back up to Nebraska to pick them up. Let these children be reminded that they are loved, valued and cherished.